READ: Esther 6:1-14, ESV

“That night the king could not sleep; so he ordered the book of the chronicles, the record of his reign, to be brought in and read to him. It was found recorded there that Mordecai had exposed Bigthana and Teresh, two of the king’s officers who guarded the doorway, who had conspired to assassinate King Xerxes.” { Esther 6:1-2 }

How I relate to the words ‘could not sleep.’ I’ve had to learn the hard way that my body can no longer take late night caffeine, sugar or any kind of evening snacking that will trigger heartburn. Otherwise, my night of rest and renewal turns into a restless night of regret and remorse. Please tell me you understand my pain.

But this isn’t the kind of sleepless night that King Xerxes is experiencing. Sometimes we can’t sleep at night because our assignment for that day isn’t through. King Xerxes had some unfinished business.

It was extremely common for kings to keep records of their doings and have it read back to them on a regular basis. Maybe it was to learn from and remember the past. Maybe it was because they were comforted by their own success. Either way, God worked in the ordinary to bring forth something extraordinary and His timing is impeccable! As the book of records is being read to him, he learns that Mordecai saved his life…five years prior. Although it wasn’t new news, it was new to him. God keeps no record of wrongs, but He does keep record of rights. He tucks them away to be used as reminders however He see’s fit. Some call it blessings, others call it favor.

“Now Haman had just entered the outer court of the palace to speak to the king about impaling Mordecai on the pole he had set up for him.” { Esther 6:4 }

Wait. Stop there.

Why had Haman entered to the outer court of the palace? He had been working all night to build a pole to impale Mordecai on. I have a confession: I sometimes lay awake at night plotting revenge against someone who hurt me or imagining how I’m going to put someone in their place for something they said to me. I spend a great deal of time picturing what it would be like to see justice served the way I think it should be.

Here’s the thing: The attitude in which we go into a situation will be the attitude by which we leave. Haman walks into this trying to play both God and King. Driven by selfish gain and ill intent, he enters the king’s court with his man-made plan. The king asks him, “What should be done for the man the king delights to honor?”

Now Haman thought to himself, “Who is there that the king would rather honor than me?” So he answered the king, “For the man the king delights to honor, have them bring a royal robe the king has worn and a horse the king has ridden, one with a royal crest placed on its head. Then let the robe and horse be entrusted to one of the king’s most noble princes. Let them robe the man the king delights to honor, and lead him on the horse through the city streets, proclaiming before him, ‘This is what is done for the man the king delights to honor!’” { Esther 6:6-9 }

Now, are these words from someone who desires to be like their king or someone who just desires to be king? Do you notice how effortlessly these words rolled off his tongue? It’s as if he had been thinking this through for a really long time. He answered with such presumption and entitlement, it’s obvious that his heart was at the mercy of his pride.

There’s a difference between self-confidence and self-obsession. Confidence remains intact no matter what. It doesn’t seek to be celebrated or admired. It’s not subject to its circumstances. Obsession is on a mission to be honored and doesn’t rest until it’s recognized and praised. It’s defined by the thoughts and opinions of others and it defined by its accolades.

If we chase the idea of being honored and ignore giving honor, we’ve missed the power of the cross. Click To Tweet

“When God wants to build high, He first has to dig deep” – Jimmy Evans.

There’s nothing more beautiful than a foundation built on love.

In the same way, I desire to embrace the courage of Esther, I want nothing more than to flee as far as possible from the pride of Haman. The higher we take ourselves up the ladder of success, the further there is to fall. When we honor God and others, He honors us.

Believe it! Trust it! Live it!
  • How has God honored you?
  • Do you recognize the blessings and favor in your life?
  • How can you step forward today to give honor to more people in your life?

Lord, remind us of your blessings both old and new. Allow us to reflect your love in every situation and honor your name with our actions. Show us the favor your given us and help us extend it to others.


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Image: Brooke Cagle

Kristin Bonin
Kristin Bonin
Hello! I’m Kristin Bonin: wife, mom, friend, speaker and writer. My name means “follower of Christ” and that’s pretty much who I am. Aside from being a sweet tea drinkin’, front porch sittin’, warm weather lovin’, southern girl (yes, we really do leave the “g’s” off at the end of words), I am also highly skilled at driving my kids to their extra-curricular activities, warming up pre-made food and asking Siri for help with homework. In the middle of my crazy, I somehow manage to find my Jesus and have learned to chase after Him while I’m also chasing the kids. I am a mom of girls and wife to my husband Chris, who is an avid runner and pun master. If time wasn’t a factor, I could read all day long and I am particularly fond of the Bible. Studying it and applying it is my heart and joy. You can find more about me at

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