“According to the law, what is to be done to Queen Vashti, because she has not performed the command of King Ahasuerus delivered by the eunuchs?” {Esther 1:15, ESV}

There is one rule and one rule only at this party, everyone drink as much as you want!  King Xerxes knows how to through a royal shindig, keep the alcohol flowing. And absolutely no restrictions.  I don’t imagine this party issued drink tickets. This was a preplanned splendid affair with an unlimited budget and a party planning king on a mission to flaunt his royal wealth and authority. No lavished detail was left out.

“And drinking was according to this edict: “There is no compulsion.” { Esther 1:8, ESV }

If there is anything I’ve learned in all my years it’s that when the alcohol is free flowing trouble inevitably follows. Conversations grow sour, poor decisions are made, and when you are the host of this type of party, pride and a puffed up ego inevitably leads the helm.

Just after we read the king’s announcement of the one party rule we continue in our text today with the king’s grand finale to his epic party. On the heels of a perfect 7-day extravaganza showing off his wealth in grand detail, the king summons his wife. Probably his most prized conquest.

Vashti, the most beautiful woman in all the world and the pinnacle of trophy wives.  As we know from the text she was throwing her own little party with all the women {Esther 1:9} of the palace.  It’s nice to see segregation between the men and women at parties isn’t just a now thing.  Albeit, they had entirely separate parties, whereas today the men tend to gather in the family room around the T.V. while the women often congregate in the kitchen.

So often the bible will answer some of our questions but leaves us hanging for others.  Vashti refused to come, her reasoning behind that decision has us guessing.  We don’t know why Vashti refused to come at the command of her husband.  Maybe they had a quarrel before this 7-day party started and she was still mad.  Or maybe she knew he wanted to parade her in front of his overly inebriated friends and she didn’t feel safe.  Or maybe the king wanted her to come dressed in only her crown, nothing else.

“bring Queen Vashti before the king with her royal crown, ” { Esther 1:11 }

Whatever her reason my guess following through with his request would have been an offense to her dignity. Something a simple conversation after the party could have cleared up, I’m sure.  However, king Xerxes makes the whole matter worse. Instead of stepping back from the situation, taking a deep breath, and waiting to sober up, he runs to his “wise men” for advice.

My guess these weren’t the level headed type of friends who will give him the hard truth but instead they were the friends who would stroke his bruised ego and tell him exactly what he wanted to hear.  Saying something like, “She needs to pay for how she dishonored you”. “She doesn’t deserve you, do you know how great you are?”  

When we’ve been hurt or publically embarrassed it’s so tempting to run to the people who will tell us exactly what we want to hear instead of the faithful few who will speak truth, even if it stings, to help us make good god fearing choices.

When we run to friends who are more concerned with puffing us up rather than build us up in Christ, we fall into folly.

My will and pull towards human wants will lure me in every time.  I need the Lord’s daily council in my life to help me make wise decisions and direct my responses.  I need His scripture filling me with truth and wisdom that is beyond my own and will build me up with a godly perspective.  God first everything else second.

We know that King Xerxes folly in this chapter makes way for God’s perfect providence and Esther eventually being crowned queen {spoiler alert}.  And we know that God is really good at being God, right!  He is able to turn our mess-ups into kingdom wins through the beauty of the gospel.   However, who wants to be that girl who relies on God to swoop in after us with all the spiritual fix-it tools and gadgets.

Instead, let’s be women who relentlessly chase after the Lord’s way.  When we are hurt – Jesus, how should I respond? When our ego takes a hit –  Lord, you are the only approval I need!  When we step out in faith in more of the Lord’s way over our way we walk in an abundance that permeates our whole life with His goodness and glory.

Believe it! Trust it! Live it!

  • Have you ever made a bad situation worse by your reaction?
  • What has God taught you through your folly?
  • Where can you see the providence of God in your life right now?  I know there is a lot, so make a list and let’s pray over them together. {If you care to share, post a comment below so we can all be encouraged.}

Lord, thank you that you are in control and not me.  Help me to lean into your wise counsel more than my own. Grow in me a deep desire to seek to know you through your word each day.  Surround me with people who will help me fan the flame of your love and truth and not my own fiery emotions and will. Lord, teach me to be a woman who relentlessly seeks after your way and not my own. ~ Amen.


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Image: Adriana Valasquez

BethAnn Foro
BethAnn Foro
Howdy, I'm BethAnn! Founder, Author, Bible Teacher, & Chief Visionary at She Believes Ministries. I love to gather and encourage women everywhere to lean into Jesus and simply BELIEVE HIM! Not just believe in God but truly believe all of Him for our whole life! I'm so happy you are here at SHE BELIEVES, I hope you find encouragement and deep refreshment for your soul through the online pages and faith-based resources at SHE BELIEVES MINISTRIES!

1 Comment

  1. Susan Shipe says:

    I am participating in Write 31 Days in the gospel of John. Three of my posts center around “Sam” the woman at the well. Colleen Mitchell is writing about Bathsheba today….all these awesome women! Great post.

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